Gender Nonconforming: What to Know About This Beautiful Term

In the last few years, conversations about gender identity and expression have taken a turn – for the good! Socially, politically, and culturally, we’ve taken conversations about gender and sex on a path where it would be almost impossible several decades ago. Amid all these discussions, the terms “Gender Nonconforming” or “Gender Nonconformity” have popped up. 

These gender identity terms have come up as a great relief for folks who defy traditional norms and accept unconventional ways of life. But what do these gender terms mean? What does gender-nonconforming mean, truly? 

Get ready with me to explore the underrated beauty of gender nonconformity, what it looks like in real life, and how it subtly influences gender identity, expression, and social expectations. 

At the end of this article, I’ve also listed some ways you can be an ally and supporter to gender nonconforming people in your life. Keep an eye out for them and share your tips with us in the comments. The best comments with support messages towards the Pride community will be shared on our social media page during Pride Month. 

What’s Gender Identity and Expression?

Before we understand what gender nonconformity is, we need to understand what gender expression and gender identity is. Gender identity is the deep-felt sense of your gender – whether it aligns with your assigned sex or not. Gender expression, on the other hand, is the outward appearance of your gender identity, including the way you dress up, act, and behave. 

The term, “gender nonconforming” is more or less a response to the norms of gender binary people aka males and females. Gender exists on a spectrum, and gender nonconformity helps us understand that one’s gender and expression cannot fit in the binary boxes. 

What Does Gender Conforming Mean?

Gender conformity is the adherence to social and traditional norms set by society and associated with your assigned gender at birth. This conforming to norms means you follow traditional gender roles, stereotypes, and behaviors deemed appropriate by society. 

Gender roles are social constructs that dictate the behaviors, roles, and expectations of one’s perceived gender. These roles are deeply ingrained in cultural norms and often reinforce the binary understanding of gender. Gender-nonconforming people come here to challenge these traditional roles and expectations by doing what they feel is good and right for them. 

Can You Be Gender Nonconforming?

Yes! The best part of being gender nonconforming is that it is not limited to a specific demographic. Anyone – regardless of their age, race, sexual orientation, or background – can identify as gender nonconforming. It’s a personal sense of one’s identity that goes beyond the conventional labels. 

If we look at it practically, then gender nonconformity can manifest in different ways. This may include people who present themselves in gender-defying roles, such as a person assigned female at birth might choose to live a masculine appearance or a person assigned male at birth might choose to adopt feminine mannerisms. 

Identifying as gender nonconforming is personal, and there are no one-size-fits-all signs. However, if you feel like you identify as gender nonconforming, then you might; 

• Feel discomfort with traditional gender norms and roles
• Feel the desire to express your true self 
• Reject social expectations based on gender and sex 

Gender Nonconforming vs. Queer vs. Gender Fluid

While the terms “gender non-conforming”, “gender-queer”, and “gender-fluid” are all related, they all represent a distinct concept. 

Gender nonconformity is the deviation from traditional societal norms, regardless of your sexual orientation. Queerness or gender-queer exists on a broader spectrum, where different identities and expressions – beyond gender – are embraced. Gender-fluidity, on the other hand, is when your gender identity fluctuates and changes over time. This could include both, masculine and feminine identities. 

How to Be an Ally to Gender Nonconforming People?

If you or someone you love identifies as gender nonconforming, then you can show your support by offering empathy, understanding, and love. Here are some ways you can be an ally to gender-nonconforming people in your life; 

1. Know Your Terms

The first thing you need to do is teach yourself about the different terms that come under gender identity and expression. Knowing the experiences and expressions of gender and sex can help you empathize and support your loved ones. Listen to stories, read books on the topic, and meet people who identify as gender nonconforming. 

2. Respect Pronouns 

We all have pronouns and we all wish to be respected for them. If you’re supporting a gender nonconforming person in your life, then respect their pronouns. Use the right pronouns consistently. Pronouns are an important part of gender identity and expression, and respecting them affirms their sense of self. 

3. Challenge Traditional Norms

You can do your part in showing your support for the pride community by challenging traditional norms and stereotypes. In your daily interactions, notice when someone assumes traditional norms and questions them. Be mindful of how you approach them and avoid reinforcing harmful stereotypes. 

4. Be Inclusive 

As an ally to the LGBTQIA+ community, it’s our responsibility to advocate for inclusivity in workplace, school, and community spaces. Make sure that people who identify as gender nonconforming are welcomed, validated, and respected in all events and environments. 

5. Raise Your Voice 

In the Pride community, not everyone gets to speak up and when they do, their voice goes unheard and invalidated. As an ally to the gender nonconforming community, you can raise your voice in their support. Share their stories, advocate for their rights, and fight against discrimination and prejudice. 

Spread Love, Not Hate…

To be gender nonconforming means to be your true self, despite society’s expectations and norms. It is a celebration of diversity and rejection of gender-conforming roles.

Understanding, supporting, and raising awareness of gender nonconformity can help you create an inclusive and accepting space for your friends, family, and fellow Pride community members. Let love and let live. Everyone, regardless of their sex and gender, or race, and ethnicity, deserves to live freely! 

Be You, Be Proud. Happy Pride!